ghini: (Default)
Ghini ([personal profile] ghini) wrote2006-08-03 01:58 pm

Tired. So tired.

Uggg. I haven't slept well in weeks, and as a result I'm kind of wandering through a fog. I think the Wellbutrin I'm on to quit smoking is part of the problem, but it may be more than that. I have an appointment with my sleep doc in a few weeks. Let's hope it works out.

Sunday night I slept for about 5 hours.

Monday night I slept for about 4 hours.

Tuesday night I went to the Tabernacle to see Tom Waits. Now that was a kickass show. I got home, took my sleeping pill... and was awake until 6am.

I'm really hoping this gets worked out if not, I'm going to be borderline retarded in a week or so.

[identity profile] eccyntric.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 06:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Um...why are you trying to quit smoking a month b/f burning man?

[identity profile] uglor.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 06:14 pm (UTC)(link)
I need to be on the Wellbutrin for a month before I quit. I figure I'll try to give it up once we get back.

[identity profile] lische.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 06:14 pm (UTC)(link)
I'll refrain from commentary on that last sentence.

obviously this means you're in need of orange beef, yah?

[identity profile] tzeca.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 06:47 pm (UTC)(link)
with some twice-cooked pork?

we loves the twice-cooked pork.

[identity profile] lische.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 08:27 pm (UTC)(link)
exactly

[identity profile] allidc.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 06:32 pm (UTC)(link)
I've known a few people new to Wellbutrin with the same symptoms; adjusting the dosage helped, if I remember correctly.

[identity profile] litovka.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 07:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Did you ever try any other anti-anxiety meds that are not Wellbutrin? Those fixed my sleeping problems a lot more reliably than sleeping pills. Maybe mention it to the sleep doc?

[identity profile] uglor.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 07:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Unfortunately, Wellbutrin is the only one that works for quitting smoking.

ok, really....

[identity profile] eccyntric.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 07:08 pm (UTC)(link)
How many times have you tried wellbutrin to quit smoking? Multiple, if i recall correctly...it obviously isn't working that well. A few ppl i know who tried it for that purpose failed when they tried to quit with zyban/wellbutrin, but then stayed quit when they they tried again later, just going cold turkey. I think determination's more important. Being miserable and sleep depped is not going to make nicotine withdrawal any easier.

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] uglor.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 07:13 pm (UTC)(link)
Actually, the last time I managed to quit long-term was for six months and it was due to the wellbutrin. I fell off the wagon the day Brian Dalton died.

It's starting to work. On days where I don't go out, I'm down to about 5 a day.

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] marieoroumania.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 08:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Hang in there. I managed to quit smoking thanks to Wellbutrin, took me several months but I haven't had a cigarette in a while. It also caused a good deal of insomnia for me too. And you know me, I am a chronic insomniac anyway, so it just made it worse. I remember Aug-Sept. 2001, I was sleeping about an hour a night, tops. It was terrible. And when I did sleep, I had screaming nightmares. It goes away. Your doc might give you Ambien or something to help you sleep. You can mail that to me if you like.

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] uglor.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 09:00 pm (UTC)(link)
I've been on Ambien for over a year now. Ambien's kung fu is weak compared to my normal insomnia plus wellbutrin. I have an appointment with sleep doc this month to see if I can get something stronger.

Re: ok, really....

(Anonymous) 2006-08-03 09:19 pm (UTC)(link)
You can mail any barbituates to me, as well. They go great with wine! BUt not as well as Ambien and sake. I did that once by accident, and ended up waking up 9 hours later in exactly the same position, still holding my glass. My my my!

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] marieoroumania.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
Whoops sorry that was me.

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] lische.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 09:13 pm (UTC)(link)
shouldn't that just be "how many times you tried to quit smoking?"

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] uglor.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 09:15 pm (UTC)(link)
I prefer to look at it as one long attempt at quitting, whith lots of ups and downs.

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] marieoroumania.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 09:20 pm (UTC)(link)
"It's easy to quit smoking. I've done it thousands of times."

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] lische.livejournal.com 2006-08-03 09:31 pm (UTC)(link)
how long did you manage to stay quit while we were roommates? i seem to remember multiple attempts during that time anyway

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] improbable.livejournal.com 2006-08-04 02:57 pm (UTC)(link)
Heh. Me too.

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] quandry.livejournal.com 2006-08-04 05:40 am (UTC)(link)
fwiw, I agree with you that determination is more important.

I only smoke 1-2 cigs every couple of months now (good god, I was even completely good the last time I was at Highlander) and never used anything but will. I'm NOT claiming that my will is somehow more powerful than uglor's... just saying that eventually, when you keep trying, there is this confluence of willpower and a period of life quietude that let you quit. The whole thing about how quitters are the ones who keep quitting thing is absolutely true. I 'quit' a few times before making it stick (unlike Uglor I'd just never talked about it, didn't want to until I was sucessful.)

There are a few things commonly recommended that I don't agree with: 1) you shouldn't try to reduce your smoking before quitting - I actually found getting myself down to 1-5 smokes/day very helpful. It was great practice for 'I want a smoke but I cant have one' before getting myself to the point where that was the case ALL THE TIME. Plus I think it helped my quitting that my body desired a lower level of nicotine than beore. You should also expect that it's just going to be a shitty time, and make some allowances for that. Try to make the first 30 days of quit-ness a (relatively) quiet time at work. Ease off on the drinking - what eccyntric posted the other day about the connection between cigs and booze is no joke. Make your peace with the fact that it's going to be incredibly annoying - when you feel like you want to kill people you should take a deep breath and remind youself that all this rage means that you're following through with your plan, therefore it's a good thing. Exercise definitely helps. Avoiding alcohol and coffee also helps (alcohol more so than coffee). (Thank god, this doesn't last forever, you can go back to drinking normally later.)

Now, this is the part where I admit that I'm smashed off my ass on chardonnay and tell you to take all this with a grain of salt. But seriously, to quit, you just need: 1) to really, really want to do it. 2) to accept that it sucks sweaty gorilla balls, and make your peace with the fact that a month or two of your life is going to be annoying and 3) to keep trying - it's rarely it works on the first or second go, and eventually you'll find a way that sticks for you. Keep tweaking your efforts - sometimes the professionals are full of shit and something they tell you won't help actually does.

Er, anyway... mmmmm, chardonnay. Hope you quit.

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] eccyntric.livejournal.com 2006-08-04 01:59 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah, the booze thing is really my problem...my smoking patterns are weird, when I'm not drinking, I can take or leave cigarettes. When I'm drunk, I chain smoke. So I can go a week without one without even really trying, if I'm not drinking that much, but as soon as I go on a bender, I crave nicotine. I don't know if I'll ever be able to quit unless I quit drinking, and I don't want to quit drinking. Oh well.

We've been watching Mike try every chemical combination under the sun to quit smoking for years now, with very little success. Hopefully it'll stick this time, but it sounds like the side effects from the wellbutrin might be bad enough that it's not worth it...I have my doubts about how much it actually helps. If you really want to quit, you can quit without it. I certainly do wish him luck this time.

Re: ok, really....

[identity profile] quandry.livejournal.com 2006-08-04 08:02 pm (UTC)(link)
Yeah... hate to say it, but sleeplessness is rarely associated with increased discipline :)

[identity profile] narsissy.livejournal.com 2006-08-04 12:04 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, the last time I tried to quit smoking I tried zyban. It took two weeks for me to go full-blown manic. My mom made me go to the Dr., that was an awesome time.

This time I'm using the patch and day 4 isn't so bad at all. I actually feel less depressed than before I quit, if that makes sense at all. Meh. Probably just the extra oxygen hitting my brain.

[identity profile] vomikronnoxis.livejournal.com 2006-08-04 01:13 am (UTC)(link)

Little bald doctors!

~rl