Dear Ron Paul supporters:
Please die. No, strike that. Eat a bag of dicks, then die in a fire. Get it?
Love, Mike
I've had it up to here with the Ron Paul supporters. There's supporting your candidate, then there's claiming he's the best thing since sliced bread, Jesus and viagra.
Here's a few hints for political discourse on the net. If you need to repeatedly USE ALL CAPS FOR EMPHASIS, stop writing. If you ever need to use the phrase "in the history of the world" when describing something about Ron Paul, stop writing. You can't even say he's the most popular person with the last name Paul in the history of the world. Alexandra Paul was on Baywatch, and a billion people watched that.
See, the problem is that there are people in this country who want a change. Then there are the people who always need to fight the power, no matter if it is right or wrong. Currently these two are in a huge marriage of convenience with Ron Paul. A ton of people are grabbing on to his few good ideas while downplaying his fucked up ones.
I'd love to see the Drug War end. I'd love to see the IRS abolished. I agree that our government needs some serious downsizing. However, I still think women should have the right to abortions. I think some things like the EPA and the FDA are good ideas. The FCC needs a tune-up, but it's a good idea too.
We need our big clunky government. It's too big and too slow, but it keeps things working. Humans are a stupid bunch. We're panicky and easily spooked. We like our comforts. If there are no real threats out there, then we will find some. If there are not terrorists blowing up shit in middle America, we will wig out over Janet Jackson's tit on the Superbowl. Let any human miss three meals in a row, and we're not happy. In America if we have to miss three meals, civilization has fallen. Big clunky government helps to stop this. It smooths out the rough spots and stabilizes it all. Sure it could stand to go on a diet, but then so could most of us.
I could go on and keep picking apart Ron Pauls positions, but my beef isn't with him. It's with his supporters. The people who seem to think America is poised in limbo. If Ron wins, we all go to heaven. If he loses, we fall into hell to be assraped by bureaucratic demons. It's the people who keep trying to convince me to vote for him, even when I say I know why I'm not going to. They are like the bright eyed christian missionaries who figure we just haven't had Jesus explained to us, and once we hear the truth, we will see the light.
I see things posted to the internet right and left about how the mainstream political machine, or the media is biased against Ron Paul. How stories are being buried, votes not counted rules changed or bent or violated. It's not all true. Sometimes the Ron Paul machine isn't making progress because we don't like you, his holier than thou supporters. You say you don't like politicians lying to you? Well, I don't like Ron Paul supporters trying to explain his positions to me again and again, when I already understand them. I don't like you telling me about Ron Paul, and acting like you are doing me a favor. You annoy the fuck out of a lot of us, and no amount of stories posted to digg or blogs or magnetic car attachment thingies will change that.
My biggest fear for this election isn't that Huckabee or Guliani will get elected. It's that the election will come and go, and the Ron Paul supporters won't go away. They will become the herpes of the 2008 election cycle: painful, annoying and impossible to get rid of. They will be the ones screaming "I told you so" from here to eternity.
Please die. No, strike that. Eat a bag of dicks, then die in a fire. Get it?
Love, Mike
I've had it up to here with the Ron Paul supporters. There's supporting your candidate, then there's claiming he's the best thing since sliced bread, Jesus and viagra.
Here's a few hints for political discourse on the net. If you need to repeatedly USE ALL CAPS FOR EMPHASIS, stop writing. If you ever need to use the phrase "in the history of the world" when describing something about Ron Paul, stop writing. You can't even say he's the most popular person with the last name Paul in the history of the world. Alexandra Paul was on Baywatch, and a billion people watched that.
See, the problem is that there are people in this country who want a change. Then there are the people who always need to fight the power, no matter if it is right or wrong. Currently these two are in a huge marriage of convenience with Ron Paul. A ton of people are grabbing on to his few good ideas while downplaying his fucked up ones.
I'd love to see the Drug War end. I'd love to see the IRS abolished. I agree that our government needs some serious downsizing. However, I still think women should have the right to abortions. I think some things like the EPA and the FDA are good ideas. The FCC needs a tune-up, but it's a good idea too.
We need our big clunky government. It's too big and too slow, but it keeps things working. Humans are a stupid bunch. We're panicky and easily spooked. We like our comforts. If there are no real threats out there, then we will find some. If there are not terrorists blowing up shit in middle America, we will wig out over Janet Jackson's tit on the Superbowl. Let any human miss three meals in a row, and we're not happy. In America if we have to miss three meals, civilization has fallen. Big clunky government helps to stop this. It smooths out the rough spots and stabilizes it all. Sure it could stand to go on a diet, but then so could most of us.
I could go on and keep picking apart Ron Pauls positions, but my beef isn't with him. It's with his supporters. The people who seem to think America is poised in limbo. If Ron wins, we all go to heaven. If he loses, we fall into hell to be assraped by bureaucratic demons. It's the people who keep trying to convince me to vote for him, even when I say I know why I'm not going to. They are like the bright eyed christian missionaries who figure we just haven't had Jesus explained to us, and once we hear the truth, we will see the light.
I see things posted to the internet right and left about how the mainstream political machine, or the media is biased against Ron Paul. How stories are being buried, votes not counted rules changed or bent or violated. It's not all true. Sometimes the Ron Paul machine isn't making progress because we don't like you, his holier than thou supporters. You say you don't like politicians lying to you? Well, I don't like Ron Paul supporters trying to explain his positions to me again and again, when I already understand them. I don't like you telling me about Ron Paul, and acting like you are doing me a favor. You annoy the fuck out of a lot of us, and no amount of stories posted to digg or blogs or magnetic car attachment thingies will change that.
My biggest fear for this election isn't that Huckabee or Guliani will get elected. It's that the election will come and go, and the Ron Paul supporters won't go away. They will become the herpes of the 2008 election cycle: painful, annoying and impossible to get rid of. They will be the ones screaming "I told you so" from here to eternity.